#i have more metas coming soon

[fumifooms]

Mickrin

Fifth entry of my “Dunmeshi rarepairs I will birth with my own hands if I have to” series. This one’s straight up embarrassing, like of course the shadow version of Chilchuck and Marcille would get me.

It suddenly grabbed me out of nowhere. What got me thinking about it is this exchange, first comic third panel, because like… Woah. He knows she has a thing for Kabru? Or something. And he has NO FEAR. Like it’s so forward and has 0 pretenses lmao. And then I thought… And oh no. Oh no.

"I can fix him" x "I can make her worse"

Very uptight and strict and rules-following and too self-aggrandizing tbh x will not hesitate to insult you to your face and sleazy and free spirit…. Kuro is involved in an ot3 of sorts in my head and basically they drag her into Situations of various moral standing aka scams or idk going to a club god forbid. I think she needs to relax and get taken down 1 peg maybe, and I think he needs like…….. Someone to teach him what is unhealthy lmao, also remind him to get work benefits, and if they can like get to feel safe and comfy with one another (and god just the road there would be a beautiful trainwreck to watch) they would be gossip besties worsties.

Kabru needs to be the epitome of morals but like, if it’s Mickbell she can lower the bar… Just for him… <3 She can fix him just a little and she’ll be like "wow! Ok I can settle for this amount of upstanding behavior from you Mickbell you get a gold star"

I never expected it ok I read this extra expecting nothing and god knows why I saw him be like "hey u like Kabru right. You’re his babysitter right. Which poor sap is being Kabru’s maid" with 0 fear and her being so casually pissed back at him and idk, how they’re so comfy being not polite with one another but they’re still coworkers-friends despite it… Crazy for how prickly they both are that they manage that much. They bicker and see each other as annoying at best but weirdly dependable and friends despite it all and……….. I am going to grow them in a lab and observe how I can make it work

MICKBELL IS A REBOUND MORE AT 9??? Maybe Rin and Mickbell have a one night stand and then the aftermath dynamic is this….. She probably regrets it. And then it gets more complex and grows into something odd as she becomes hyperaware of him and they have this little complicity thing going on….

I think cuddling with Kuro (who would be more like a platonic protective & soothing presence in his and Rin’s relationship rather than romo) would destress her actually I think she needs and deserves it. Go to a dog cafe bbygirl it’ll fix you. So what I’m saying is the three of them watch a movie and Rin and Mickbell are sitting on Kuro’s laps and everyone is so comfy. Kuro’s legs die halfway through but he’s self-sacrificing it’s fine….. Actually Mick is on his laps Rin’s just nuzzled into his side. There, fixed. I am so weirdly invested in them… They’re funky to think about. Rin seeing Mickbell and Kuro like "you guys are aware that what you two have is fucked up right" and then joining them in the messy dynamic 🤝  Put them in situations. That will be all.

The sheer amount of sass on their own, let alone together…

Make them get drunk together it’ll be glorious

[relicsongmel]

Reblog if you love this girl ❤️

[its-your-mind]

ALRIGHT IVE BEEN HOLDING ALL OF MY INSANE AND DETAILED THEORIES INSIDE FOR FOUR MONTHS AND THEY HAVE GROWN AND FESTERED INTO SOMETHING ENTIRELY THEIR OWN AND I’M MAKING THEM ALL YOUR PROBLEM NOW HERE WE GOOOOO

okay so anyway my current main theory is that Jon Martin and Jonah got schlorped into this other reality along with the fears but the way it happened led to EITHER their weird entrapment in mostly digital media (a lá the Leitners), which ALSO led to Jon and Martin and Jonah also getting stuck in whatever this equivalent of collecting fear-based stories shit is. So obvs they’re those three voices Norris (Martin), Chester (Jon), Augustus (Jonah) (Jon and Jonah are ENTIRELY guesses at present - if it is Jonah he’s the one with the v pretentious-sounding name for SURE tho) I have forgotten what those names are. Apologies.

Anyway I think it’s a weird fusion of whatever the Web was attempting with that website that collected stories, AND the role of the archive AND the creation of the panopticon by a man who was VERY. DEDICATED. TO. SORTING. AND. CATEGORIZING. So they’re collecting data, archiving stories for the Eye (Jon is still the Pupil and the Archivist, after all), but Jon and Martin prolly wanna help. Categorize. Give these people a fighting fucking chance. If I think about them too hard rn I’ll have an emotional breakdown so that’s a post for another time.

But anyway. The forced categorizing (dolls, watching / dolls, skin / all the subcategories under “Reanimation”). The voices reading them out. All of the computers and cameras and mics recording all these convos between the employees. The organization whose job is just reading and filing supernatural data and stories accurately which is important for some reason that no one can really understand or explain. Hahaha. Sounds familiar.

Anyway I’m obsessed with all of these new characters. I’m so excited to spend all of the time with them!! And be terrified of the horrors that are gonna come after them!!!!

[olivegardenhunter]

The sannin as normal childhood friends who have sleepovers and play games in the forest and bond over liking "gross" animals

anon thank you SO much for this mental image. you have made my very miserable assignment-filled day. I have many thoughts about the sannin and baby sannin being inseparable best friends who were just normal kids make up about 90% of them. here's some hc I have about that (sorry for the massively long post, I'm a yapper at heart)

yes absolutely. I like to think of the sannin as misfits who never fit in anywhere else except with each other. there's so many different reasons for this. we know they became genin at age 6. if this makes them the exception, rather than it being the normal practice for a village in tumultuous times, then this must have meant each of them were prodigies in their own rights in the academy (yes, even Jiraiya I'd say, though I'd suspect his was more a case of recognised potential rather than showing any obvious prodigal talent from the get-go). this is further reinforced by the fact the third hokage became their sensei. I doubt the hokage would've taken up any random group of genin as his students. if this is the case, can you imagine how difficult it must've been for them to make friends with others, their age or otherwise? not only would it be hard to relate to their other peers cause of the age and probably ability gap, but I'd imagine people would've found them downright intimidating! all this, along with all their individual personality which, if their 6 year old selves were anything like their 50 year old selves, would've meant the little baby sannin would not have been anyone's first choice of friends.

so I'd imagine each of them being a bit of loners in the academy. then they get put in a team together. recognise they each stick out like a sore thumb from everyone else, but have all of the above common ground. their personalities are difficult for each to get used to initially, but once they do, these three super super super quickly become absolutely inseperable. to call them family would've been a serious underestimate of their relationship imo.

anyway this is all a long winded way of saying YES they're absolutely those regular childhood best friends who have sleepovers and hang out and play games. I imagine that tsunade grew up with a massive family in a massive loving home. direct contrast to orochimaru who's an orphan and, I imagine jiraiya is an orphan too (hence no canon last name). therefore, the senju compound is typically the designated sleepover venue.

the senju compound has mito, and nawaki, and depending on what your hcs are, would have tsunades parents, and I'd think they'd still effectively live like royalties even if the first and second are dead. (hashirama and tobirama wouldn't be around anymore by the time the three became genin I think, because (and someone correct me if I'm wrong) hiruzen would've already been hokage when he took on the three of them as his students, meaning tobirama would have already passed)

jiraiya and orochimaru just being at awe at the way tsunade lives and just how lively her house is and tsunade is just happy to have kids her age at home with her that just gets her cause her parents always nag her about training and chores, mito still treats her like a baby even though she's already a Shinobi that can take care of herself damn it!, and nawaki is so young he's so boring and sometimes gets annoying. so she always convinces her fellow teammates to come over to her house to practice and train, to babysit nawaki with her, to be the test dummy for try out this new jutsu or technique she's learning, and anything else that she insists she cannot do alone and needs them to be there with her

until suddenly it's already dark and oh her teammates can't possibly walk home all alone at this hour and besides my mum's making dinner and it's your favourite jiraiya and she'd scold me if I didn't offer some to you guys and orochimaru, mito found some sort of old scroll that uncle tobirama wrote about a new jutsu that she wants your thoughts on and besides, we have to meet sensei soooo early tomorrow for our mission and the training ground is closer from my house anyway, and you guys are just trying to get out of the bet we made and that's cheating y'know! and and and suddenly the senju compound just so happen to always have a few sets extra clothes and pyjamas that just so happened to be orochimaru and jiraiya's size and hey oro, raiya, look! it's got toads and snakes! and it matches mine! and the adults always just so happen to have two extra plates set at the table during meals, and the house just so happens to always be stocked up with both her teammate's favourite snacks, and orochimaru and jiraiya can suddenly enter the senju compound at any time of the day, with or without tsunade, and are greeted joyfully by the household's residents who had started nagging at them about training and chores and picking up after themselves, and mito is treating them like babies even though they're fully trained shinobis! and nawaki is being sooo annoying today and damn it, why isn't tsunade home yet? we agreed to train at 3!

(the three of them never quite notice that jiraiya or orochimaru's unannounced visits to the senju compound never trigger any of the seals that are activated by the presence of non-senju, non-family chakra in the compound. they never quite notice that the anbu guards at the front never give jiraiya and orochimaru any of the trouble or scrutiny that any visitors or guests to the senju compound are always subjected to, and the guards merely let them in with a slight bow of their heads, the same way they would to tsunade, or mito, or her parents.)

the only other times the sleepover isn't at tsunade's place is when there's a thunderstorm and orochimaru insists he needs to spend the night at his apartment because he tells them that last time the storm was this bad, lightning had struck a branch that smashed through his apartment that, if he wasn't already there and was even a little slower, would have destroyed the very few things his parents had left him that he so carefully keeps in a chest and he cannot ever take the risk that that would ever happen again he lost his power and his food went bad in his fridge, and c'mon tsu, you know oro not-so-secretly has a fear of thunder! don't you remember what happened last time at that mission where we were camping? we can't possibly let him spend the night alone at his house!

(later on when they're older, they'll come to find that jiraiya's new jonin apartment will become the new designated sleepover venue as jiraiya begins bringing back questionable sake from his missions that they were definitely too young to be having that he could not have possibly obtained that legally, and mito started banning them from playing card games at the senju compound when she noticed her granddaughter's tendency to lose her entire pay packet in a single game was becoming a bit too familiar to her... like a certain husband of hers' gambling habits that she had tried so hard to make sure wouldn't get passed on to the grandchild who the man had unwittingly taught said card games to at the age of 4. jiraiya started to call his apartment the degenerates' club then, much to the other two's dismay. though they couldn't quite protest when he correctly pointed out they were absolutely behaving like degenerates, even if princess tsunade and the leaf's once-in-a-generation prodigy felt like they were above those sort of disreputable behaviour.)

jiraiya and orochimaru fight tooth and nail that the massive forest that makes up the backyard of the compound, created by the shodaime himself of course, is the only reason they choose to hang out with tsunade at the senju compound, because princess tsunade (dammit oro stop calling me that!), the shodaime hokage seemed to have left so many fascinating things in this forest, there's so many secrets to discover. I don't think I've seen any of these species anywhere else in Konoha. I believe the secrets to some of his jutsu or techniques lie in this forest... oro you're such a nerd. and besides, Princess, the snakes here really seem to like oro for some reason and I think the toads are about to make me their king, I'm sure of it! and also, me and oro are the only people who don't find the fact you use the slime from those slugs in your potions or whatever absolutely disgusting, so we're the only friends you have to play in this gigantic forest with in the first place (it's not potions, it's a new medicinal gel I'm creating! and can you two just shut up? hide and seek is supposed to be a SILENT game and right now, you both really suck at it! I can literally locate you without even moving!) ...hey tsu, is mito-sama going to make those cookies she made last time again? she told me yesterday she would cause hiruzen-sensei told her we did a good job on our last mission.

the three of them knew everyone in Konoha had started calling them the 'Hokage's brats' behind their backs. but none of them realised that, particularly among the elders, this didn't seem to just be in reference to their sensei... there were other, more hushed whispers going around that if they had tried to listen to, would've sounded something like the adopted senjus... or lord first and second's legacies...

(these rumours may or may not have started when people started noticing tsunade's parents went from talking about their two children they adored, to their three rascals plus sweet little nawaki. or when mito kept comparing jiraiya's antics and personality to hashirama or orochimaru's brooding nature and hunger for knowledge was like tobirama's, or how tsunade's own hot temper and tenacity but also mischief was like her own's and the many Uzumakis that came before her, and that all three of them together balanced each other the way she, hashirama, and tobirama had. or when hiruzen constantly raves about his students and how much he sees his senseis in each of them and how the will of fire burns so brightly in them that he knew lord first and second would be extremely proud to see. in the end, though tsunade may have been the only one who shared a name with the senju founders, everybody couldn't help but see hashirama and tobirama and everything they had been and everything they had stood for in all three of the legendary sannin.)

[every-sanji]

[koskela-knights]

At this point, with the Night Springs DLC having come out and how i've felt about Jesse's chapter and Coffee World and the overall (under) usage of named NPCs from the AW2 canon, I keep thinking....

I feel the Cult of the Tree lost all its narrative purpose and emotional impact due to FBC involvement. The Cult and the Koskelas might have well been some random unnamed NPC Cult Leaders or heck, they might as well have been replaced by a sentient lamp and their relevance and impact and the outcome would've been the same. It could've been some other random murder case that would've attracted Saga and Casey's attention to BF for how little pay-off we got for the Cult arc. The final 'wrap-up' if you will, is totally missable and optional. At this point, nobody even cares anymore that the Cult were actual the good guys all along.

Even Remedy seems to have forgotten about the whole Cult arc and the Koskelas as characters and I feel the fandom even mirrors that in some waysthere

[igottayellsomewhere]

From Episode 5

"sometimes when I try to look ahead, all I see is back"

back where sanji

like, you could think about this line on a surface-ish level and say back to germa and all that angst ect, sure, but then what is back? what could there possibly be to go back to that he'd want to go to?? and that begs the question, what is forward?

so, at this point in opla they show that he's getting increasingly frustrated with zeff and that is the conflict thats set up to be a push forward, but it also really feels like the characters could have been at this crossroads before. Like, this is a repeating pattern but it always ends the same, sanji is frustrated then zeff let's him back into the kitchen then creativity and the need to be Free strikes and theyre at it again. And because sanji has decided to dedicate himself to zeff and repaying a kindness he could never imagine *there's nothing to look back or forward to*. This is the best scenario. He needs to fulfill zeffs dream before he can think about his own and There's No Other Option. So what is back?

Back is repaying zeff. A debt he can *never* repay

And though they do share the same dream and sanji still wants, yearns, for the All Blue, he can never give himself permission to do so. So forward is Here, at the Baratie, and he daren't dream because it's impossible to wrap his head around why zeff would do anything for a person like sanji, scratch that *just* sanji.

And then you gotta take into account that zeff is purposely squashing sanjis potential at the Baratie cause zeff wants sanji to realize that that's Not the path for sanji. If zeff gave sanji the responsibility he craves that would be like zeff putting the final blow on both their dreams. Zeff is begging sanji to want more but for sanji thats unfathomable; again, This is the Best Case Scenario and he can't bring himself to believe there's more.

So thinking forward or backward is just a moot point, which is why it's so jarring for Luffy to come in and say both that he doesn't do regrets or 'complicated' cause that's what sanji's dream is. When presented with the idea that it could be so simple, when Luffy says join us, there's a long pause. The idea has sprouted but the roots must be crushed. Like always.

I guess here would be a good time to compare the live action and the anime, like, zoro's dream having a big part in the anime/manga, ect. It's true that the only interaction opla zoro had with opla sanji before joining the crew officially was the dinner scene but I don't think the influence of zoros dream on sanji is as lost as some might say.

Opla sanji sees the aftermath of The Fight clearly, sees how many lengths Zoro would go to. He sees Luffy defend Zoro's dream vehemently, when Nami asks why Luffy didn't stop Zoro. In this moment it's reiterated that a person's dreams are Important and that Zoro was *right* to go after them, was *right* to be selfish and try to take something he wanted. Nami's was the dialogue sanji has been telling himself all his life, keep those you care for safe no matter what, no matter if it hurts to do it. Luffy's was a dialogue of I will not keep people from doing what they want, no matter what. No matter how much is "owed" to someone, a dream is Worthy, even if it makes those you're close to disappointed and sad. Which. Is one of many things sanji has been trying desperately to avoid. There's the tiniest crack of light trying to shine through, that maybe one can follow their dreams and have people care about you.

If this moment between the crew had not happened I'm not sure opla sanji would have joined the straw hats.

In this moment, sanji sees someone (zoro) who is willing to go forward, no matter what, and witnessing there are still people that care for that person even in that decision (Luffy, Nami, Ussop). The last time sanji Left there was a severance and no one to help him. He was on his own. Mustering up that courage Again would be... well, it'd be impossibly difficult. Seeing that there were people *for* the fool who followed their dreams was just as important as seeing someone follow their dreams, but Zoro needed to have a dream in the first place. Not one that could be squashed down, but one he was willing to and nearly died for. Someone could do anything for a dream and still be, well, worthy.

So he sees this crew, sees a chance, sees a worldview he's never dared hope for. And it's kind of the perfect opportunity but he darent hope quite yet. All he can do for now is feed and take care of these incredibly kind people and appreciate who they are while theyre here. So he does.

And then the Fishman show up. Sanji is Needed and he Can't abandon his home he needs to be there, end of story. Then Luffy offers to help and the world shifts. Again, sanji is facing a kindness he can't fathom deserving and the guy offers it enthusiastically, without hesitation. Sanji allows this kindness cause maybe its a way to be even, to allow someone to be kind is a kindness kinda thing. But either way he's gotta Go so let's not think on this too much and help zeff.

In the restaurant, sanji keeps his promise. He fights for zeff without hesitation. But then he gets thrown into a table (ouch) and can barely move. What now??? It's probably Panic City but then Luffy is there. Luffy is *defending zeff's dream*. Sanji takes a moment to recover and then we don't see him until he dives into the water after Luffy. But can you imagine????

This random boy is going head to head for zeff's dream. The thing Sanji *has* to protect. The other two fishmen are standing watch at the baratie entrance but as soon as they're gone sanjis out there, and what is out there? This random boy getting thrown to his death. And this random boy has a dream. And if he can save this random boy's dream, maybe sanji can have a dream too. But not now, later. Now we gotta help zeff rebuild.

And so sanji faces a final Forward. Zeff can see how much sanji cares and knows he has to break this boy's heart. There's no other way. We don't explicitly see zeff hearing that luffy offered sanji a place on his crew but a bit ago luffy got right in zeffs face and defended sanji, told him outright sanji is the type of person zeff hoped he would be. If this is gonna be the final push zeff can push him to somewhere he knows sanji will be valued. So he does, in the only way he knows sanji can accept.

This makes their final farewell even more heartbreaking. We can see there's a moment where both parties consider not saying anything. Theres Too Much but also Not Enough. And then they do, they say "take care", sanji says thank you, "thank you for putting up with my shit" and "I owe you my life". There's a thank you for the Past and a thank you for the Forward. Thank you for what is about to be.

"sometimes when I try to look ahead, all I see is back"

And now there's Both. A past to fondly remember and grow from and a future to look forward to.

back where sanji? What is back now?? Forward. Ahead. Back to a life of adventure on his terms.

[cocoa-rococo]

thinking about iggy koopa today, and i realized one of the reasons i like him so much isn't just because he's a loony lil guy who likes causing explosions (though that definitely adds to it). it's because he makes a great rubber-ball character.

by that, i mean he's fascinating to put with others and see what dynamics pop up in response, as well as how he shifts the character development of those he interacts with. you throw a rubber ball at a surface, and it either bounces back or breaks something.

he's an inventor! which means he can create things that impact a story: macguffins that other people (good and bad) want, devices that help other characters fix their problems (or "fix" them, and cause more issues down the road), and gives him a need to perhaps talk and travel with other people to get supplies he requires.

it also gives something for him to bond with in others, whether that be through a fellow love of or rivalry. it also might give him a hard time connecting with people if they don't share that passion, which means they both might have to find some common ground in different ways so the two can work well together, if at all.

the other neat thing is that iggy does not take anyone super seriously at face value, not even bowser (remember how he laughed in his face in bjj?), and that makes him really fun as a foil for more sterner characters. put in a room with ludwig, wendy, and yes, even mario -- who're more likely to be assured about their abilities and inclined towards keeping order -- and watch what happens. how do they get along? can they, even? what's something that would make them do so?

it also makes him a nice buddy to pair with those who're less concerned about "big pictures" affairs -- like larry, morton, and roy -- to tag along and snipe in his own commentary with whatever they're doing. his whole dynamic with lemmy is a great example: they're able to balance each other out and grow while still maintaining their Silly Guy personalities.

he's such a cool character to put next to others and see how things change, from plots and stories to character growth. he also just so happens to be the fun flavor of Mad Scientist Turtle while he's at it.

[fakeosirian]

anatomy of a scene - house of anubis s2x85

joy and fabian's fight during the senet game makes me feel INSANE. i'd elaborate more above the cut but that'd defeat the purpose of the cut. so. long story short: this is one of, if not the best scene in the show in regards to character writing in the moment and as a fulcrum in the story at large (in my opinion). transcript + meta as follows:

JOY: What's the point in asking for my help if you're not going to listen to me?

FABIAN: I got it wrong. Okay.

JOY: Wrong? Fabian, this isn't chess; if we make a mistake, someone falls through the floor!

FABIAN: Don't you think I know that? I feel bad enough as it is!

JOY: So you should.

JOY: None of them have signed up for this. Even Victor chickened out when he knew what the stakes were!

(one of the top 10 funniest cuts of the series)

FABIAN: No- Anyway, who knows what would have happened if we had done your move!

JOY: Worst case scenario? We'd have lost Amber. But I would have had two players playing this game instead of one.

FABIAN: You always have to be right and rub everyone else's noses in it, don't you? And do you know why? It's because you're a bully and a control freak.

(screenshots can't do it justice -- the way her face changes is SO subtle, but her eyes get flat and her whole face tenses up. it's eerie)

JOY: Yeah? Well, you're a geek and a coward.

FABIAN: You're a witch.

JOY: Doormat.

They stare in opposite directions. Long beat.

JOY: So what do we do now?

FABIAN: I don't really think we have much of a choice, do we?

Another beat -- still not looking at each other.

FABIAN: Joy...I'm sorry.

Joy nods ever so slightly. She takes a short breath in.

JOY: Okay. Let's do this.

She only makes eye contact in the brief moment before she turns to sit back down.

not gonna transcribe the whole next scene but key point is instead of being irritated on her own behalf or shutting down completely, joy is acting more similarly to before patricia/amber fell through -- then she was visibly nervous, but now she's bordering on tears and openly expressing her doubts about her abilities. she says that she's worried about the "victor" guard because his movements are "unpredictable," but we know she feels that way because she couldn't get a good angle recording him before to study him like the others. throughout the scenes, she's gone from more plainly stating she's frustrated she couldn't get a solid reference on him to making him out to be almost sentient, something beyond her ability to predict despite the mundane reason for it. (could be that he's genuinely moving at random, but i'm choosing to interpret it the interesting character motivation way, especially considering her reasons for naming that guard "victor." girlie is projecting and i don't blame her)

fabian's also done a complete 180 in his demeanor since the fight, gently reassuring her, looking at her with the most fondness we've seen towards her this entire season tbh, and explicitly stating his confidence in her abilities in no uncertain terms. then, he does something really interesting: he lies. he says that he wants her to tell him what her next move would be, promising that he won't do it (with a tone of voice that implies he thinks it'd be ridiculous to do so and he just wants to "review"); once she does, he IMMEDIATELY does them and is totally fine. even when the guard almost whacks him in the head, he looks more defiant than anything.

the neat thing here is there's LAYERS to this fight and what each insult they throw at each other means re: the past, the present, and the future. the future's the easiest because it appears surface level -- they're both doing the opposite of what they were accused of before. joy's not looking to control anything and refuses to cause harm to him; while he's doing exactly as he's told, it's not as a doormat or a coward would. he's making a gamble by not only doing the opposite of what she wanted for him (despite it being her strategy), but even abandoning his own perception of the game (so not even being a "geek" either).

there's more implications for further in the future, but that's on like, level 4 of subtlety and narrative complexity so let's do the past first.

now, my feelings on the nina/fabian/joy love triangle are WAY too extensive to fit in this post, but i'll do my best to condense how i feel about the jabian side of things. joy overstepped repeatedly to a critical degree and was aware she was overstepping. fabian didn't trust himself to communicate his discomfort in a way that wouldn't hurt her feelings (he clearly doesn't think highly of his own interpersonal skills and defaults to other people's advice, even if he thinks it's not very good. that's how little he trusts himself), so he was caught in a bind: he's not to blame for freezing up around someone whose opinion of him he took very seriously, but despite the fact that she acted beyond inappropriately, i can see why joy would feel led on.

joy sidebar: the main things i think of here are the kiss-under-false-pretenses and the movie date. that's definitely material better left for another meta but tl;dr on my thoughts: her behavior was inherently self-destructive at its core, but that doesn't change the fact that when she sets herself up to either experience the best thing or worst thing ever because she can't stand the uncomfortable grey area between, she's setting up everyone around her for the same, which is Appropriately Selfish for a teenager, especially one fresh off of a uniquely horrific traumatic event! i love joy because she's chronically wrong!

fabian sidebar: i think he would have had a far easier time talking to joy if nina wasn't an intervening variable, despite his feelings for her in theory making it easier to turn someone down. that's all i'll say here

SO. the insults, interpreted with that context. "bully" is definitely referencing "ninagate," and while my first instinct was "control freak" referencing the exhibition/ball/how she drags fabian around in general (and i think that's what he thinks he's getting at), the more i think about it, the more i'm convinced it's projection on his part. more on that in the present section.

she reacts by shutting down because that's...kinda what everyone's been calling her already this entire season. and not without reason -- the scenes where patricia confronts her about her behavior (and they start to grow apart as a result) are well placed throughout the narrative, each triggered by something very specific and with a general trend towards distance, but it's not a straight line. joy's felt she's gotten some "redemption" lately being let in on the senet game, so having it "snatched away" kicks her right back to self-preservation instincts: fighting back, even if it means she's "living up to the reputation" that feeds the vicious cycle of her behavior.

"geek" is deliberately impersonal as an insult because her pulling back and not only seeing him so one-dimensionally, but pulling out an insult he'd hear from someone who isn't close to him (doesn't understand/appreciate his intelligence and interests) tells him she doesn't give a shit about him. she obviously does, but she can't let him think that him thinking so lowly of her would hurt her as much as it does. he'd "win." (gee, i wonder why someone betrayed by adult figures in their life, those who as a child you'd previously rely on as your foundational source of and model of trust, would make someone react that way...)

"witch" is fabian's default insult towards bullies. it's what he called patricia when she was picking on nina early season 1 despite their existing friendship, indicating it's an insult designed to set him apart from "being on your side" -- a counterattack to her doubling-down on the "bully" persona he set up for her in this conversation (though in the context of ninagate, it's not an unfair assessment, and she definitely chose to embody it (hello self-destruction) before he called it out directly).

i didn't talk about coward with geek because it's wrapped up in "doormat." she held back before he said witch -- despite the fact that she was the first to feign a lack of closeness with "geek," him seeming to confirm this sentiment tips her over the edge into stating something...particularly twisted coming from her. if anyone has taken advantage of the fact that he's a doormat when it comes to social interactions, it's her. "coward" can be localized to the senet game more easily -- she had a point earlier! why ask her for help if you're going to be bossy anyway? makes it seem like he's just trying to divest responsibility without the power and make her feel like a scapegoat! (uncharitable read, but understandable in this tense environment!) but doormat? he's not being a doormat now. he's been a doormat in the past (notably only in regards to social/relationship stuff -- he's generally a decision-maker and even "insubordinate" when it comes to mystery stuff. he defers to nina a lot, but only if he doesn't think he knows better -- see: getting patricia and alfie involved behind her back). joy knows reminding him of a big insecurity like that will get under his skin. get under his skin, and maybe he'll stop. (and he does. note that her automatic logic here doesn't consider just...demanding he stop in plain language. he probably would, but once again: fundamental lack of trust triggered! it's not "personal" to him in that he caused that issue, but it hit the button.)

does she like that he's a doormat, though? honestly, i don't think she does. she likes when he goes along with what she wants to do, but not because she told him to -- she just wants to do things with him, and she thinks she has to find the "right thing" that will "make him realize he does." when talking to patricia, she implies she truly believes fabian wants to go along with whatever thing she's pressuring him into at that given moment, despite patricia trying to tell her that he's...well, a doormat who can't say no to her. she wants him to want her out of persuasion, not intimidation. her calling him a doormat wasn't just an insult; it's a resignation. it's her giving up hope on not only a romantic connection but maybe friendship, especially since that revelation had to be dragged out of her by him finally not being a doormat and overcorrecting (as he's prone to do. see: the poem recitation to nina disaster).

speaking of...the present.

the irony of the present is that they're not in a romance plotline scene. they're in a mystery plotline scene, where fabian expresses VERY different character traits re: what i was saying before about the doormat comment. joy arguably does too -- it's harder to get a read on her because she's only one level above a human macguffin in s1 and hasn't interacted with the plot directly until This Arc, but with the small sample we have, we can see she's far more inclined to caution, knowing full well the consequences of making mistakes but without the regular exposure to desensitize her. when she asks what they're supposed to do next and fabian tells her they have One Option, he doesn't need to say what that option is, and it's not important. what he's communicating is far subtler than that; his more haphazard approach to strategy -- deliberating/mitigating but actively taking risks regardless of previous failure -- isn't borne of pure recklessness. she's optimistic you can sit out and still survive but cynical you could survive by trying; he's cynical (and correct, in this case) about nonparticipation, knowing it's Not An Option, but optimistic that if they just take one more risk they can win back and surpass their losses. they have before, and the consequences of opting out are beyond taking an automatic failure.

it ties back into his social doormatism; he wouldn't be able to live with himself knowing he abandoned nina because he can't deny her anything, even if it's her breaking up with him or her asking him to throw himself in a hole. calling that "being a doormat" is really, really uncharitable of course, but for the sake of the parallel, he has to RESIST being a doormat to joy (and has no problem doing so -- he overrides her MULTIPLE times in this plotline after telling her she's in charge) to do so, which while the "only option" for him, is obviously difficult because of the habits he's developed on the social side of things. the fabina relationship has always been part of the "plot" side of the show to me, with s2 muddying the waters/making it straddle the line with the "slice of life" stuff more by involving joy and giving them romance scenes that aren't entirely related to the mystery. this scene does the reverse for jabian -- it's officially plot because fabian finally used character traits he only has access to in a plot context to impart consequences to the "slice of life" plot, officially ending it. there's a reason no jabian turning down/closure scene before this really felt "real" -- it had to be broken down here, like this.

i think it's also for that reason that she doesn't return his apology. some of it is her still having shit on her end to work through, but i have a hunch that you could attribute the source of some of that shit to her realizing that Exact Thing. he's putting nina over her. it doesn't have to be through every hoop i jumped through up there -- it's as simple as the unspoken gut feeling of "you'd never say that to nina."

to tie up the rest of the insults re: the present, most of them are equally contradictory to their current situation/the immediate reason the fight started. (she wasn't bullying anyone/being especially "witchy" beyond being a little harsh towards him. he wasn't being a coward. him being "a geek" could be in reference to him needing to be involved in the "brains" part of the operation here, but that's a bit of a reach.)

but the most interesting one is "control freak," which i mentioned i'd be circling back to later. now is later! joy's not being a "control freak" -- he literally asked her to help and won't let her do her job. that's the projection, by the way. he's the one overstepping, and while i at least can tell it's coming from...not an intentionally bad place per se (mix of guilt running amok/being the usual "ideas guy" and doesn't know how else to deal with feeling stressed out despite it Not Helping/Genuine Concern And Fear), it's certainly super obnoxious of him to take it out on joy, and i wouldn't discount the interpretation of him being arrogant/a bit of a chauvinist here, lmao. chauvinism doesn't feature much, if at all, in his characterization as a pattern, but arrogance certainly can.

i say can because this is the 4th layer of future, LOL. the senet game serves as great foreshadowing (and in some ways, a better version of, in my opinion) fabian succumbing to the sin of pride -- to RFS himself, no less, who designed this game as a hubris trap. it's notable that sinner-fabian targets joy to insult directly, ESPECIALLY after she's had such a successful growth period while so many other people in the house became the worst versions of themselves, and i like to think that was written with this in mind.

i'm going to be saving any s3 thoughts past that for another day because they're...complicated, and i'm not sure how to best express them yet and REALLY don't want to contribute to tired-out discourse or come off like a hater, lmfao. the only reason i even Mention it is because i don't have any of the...usual? issues with it? i have no gripes with screen time balance and like that it really delves into the logical-conclusion consequences of previous seasons. if anything, it has a lot of my favorite shit (KT, joy's "redemption arc," fabian being allowed by the story to be as unreliable as other characters, eddie's maturation). my issue is more in the very-pretentious-narrative-theory zone (specifically craft stuff like tone and the specific mechanics of how character development functions on screen, not necessarily what the characters develop into), so i'll leave that for the "The Only Two (2) Functional Changes I Would Make To Season Three That Leave It Both Essentially The Same, And Yet Different Enough To Solve What I Believe Are Critical Audience Engagement Complications" post? i guess?

if you made it this far, i'll buy you some eyedrops because i know MY eyes are dry after typing this beast up in one sitting. i am terminally verbose :3 but fr, thank you! let me know what you think, ESPECIALLY if you disagree. i promise i won't call you a geek or a bully <3

[skitskatdacat63]

Me rewatching True Detective, fully knowing of the fact that I'm incapable of being normal abt anything, and finding myself getting increasingly more insane about it as the days go on: ah look it's consequences of my actions

[todayisafridaynight]

We’re having an emergency meeting to discuss Chris Johnson and the whitest name ever

absolutely fitting for our white man now innit

[bushido-jack]

//Something I relate to with Samurai Jack, is that feeling of life finding every opportunity to push you back down, to kick your legs out from under you, bring you to your knees, leave you screaming, in pain, desperate, on fire. And yet to persevere, not just for your sake, but because you don’t see any other way. And somehow, even limping, you’ll find a way to wring out peace, happiness, contentment, love, and passion from this never ending path of pain. If you are to suffer, but there is no other way, there must be joy to be gripped with white knuckles and hungry claws, to fight for peace and to strive for hope even in the midst of all your anger and confusion and despair.

I may feel like there’s no way out, but I’ve got to keep moving. There are people out there depending on me to not give up. I can’t let these forces trying to cut my journey to an abrupt end win— even if I’m tired, even if I feel like it’s too much. When I feel alone, I let my mind picture what they’d want, I let myself mourn and wonder and wish, but I don’t let it give up. I can’t go see you yet. I have more to do. Watch me and I will see you when my work is done. But I will hold onto you for all of my life. I will make my life a service to you, my actions a memorial that can be trailed to you. In every move I make I will tell the ones I love, gone and with me, “this is for you, this is for you,” and when I live, even with tears and anger and joy, “this is for you.”

[harboneger]

did u know that actually posting on tumblr instead of letting your account rot with misuse and scattered reblogs is fun?? Because apparently I did not

[notcatherinemorland]

i am SO ready and SO prepared for mcm Saturday and Sunday (I say, lying, lyingly) but also no really for real. I've got to curl the front part of the wig and sew pearls on the cape and then... then.... it's Essek Time!!!!

[iwoulddieforienzo]

CHILDE AND YELAN ARE RUNNING DIRECTLY AFTER EACH OTHER. AGONY

[rubys-domain]

why do i feel like building 2 pc 2 pc is harder than building 4 pc